June One-liners

New one-liners for June 2015.

Here are some new one-liners I’ve added. This time there’s a little word play. But then a good pun is its own reword.

  • Just say NO to negativity.
  • Your worst humiliation is only someone else’s momentary entertainment.
  • Winter is the season in which people try to keep the house as warm as it was in the summer, when they complained about the heat.
  • Stable relationships are for horses.
  • I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
  • Wisdom is a comb given to a man once he is bald.
  • Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television.
  • Trust in God, but tie your camel.
  • Communism doesn’t work because people like to own stuff.
  • The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
  • Hey, I may have Alzheimer’s, but at least I don’t have Alzheimer’s!
  • Any small object when dropped will hide under a larger object.
  • My opinions are my wife’s, and she says I’m lucky to have them.
  • There is no evidence to support the notion that life is serious.
  • If flattery gets you nowhere, try bribery.


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