Today I did something I haven’t done for almost two years. I played basketball. Or to say it the right way: I was shootin’ some hoops with my homie, Terje. Even if it had been as much as two years since I last grabbed a basketball, I quickly found out that I was just as good as when I practiced regularly in Trondheim. I still sucked ass. Another thing I realized was that it was just as much fun as it used to be. The closest court is just a couple of hundred meters away, but the baskets were pretty messed up, so I guess we should be looking for a better court.
As for TC – you might be getting tired of hearing about this by now, but as you know this site is where I channel all my frustrations and TC is a major one at the moment – I’ve not tried to reach her today as planned, but rather listened to Karine’s advice and kept my mouth shut and the phone out of reach. Let’s see how that goes. I have to admit I took a long run all the way to Paradisbukta and Huk yesterday just so I could accidentally bump into her or her mother there. They sometimes walk their dog in that area. But all I got out of it was a good jog.
While writing this entry, I ended up trying to reach her again. I didn’t call, but I left a message for her on the site. I’m a weak guy, it seems. Once again, the frustration is driving me. The problem is I don’t know if I’m unable to break through to her because she’s zoning out or because she’s brushing me off. I just need to know that. It’s all I ask for. Just a simple answer to the question “why?”. If she’s zoning out, I can wait and have a talk about this when she’s back in the real world. If she’s brushing me off, I can forget about her and move on.
God damn! Have any of you experienced anything similar? Can you understand my frustration, or are you just pointing at me and making strange faces?
I’ve been walking around in a coma both yesterday and today, half awake and half asleep. I’m not sure why. Now I think I’ll have a quick shower and go to sleep.