May One-liners

Here are a few additions to the one-liners collection:

  • There is a light at the end of every tunnel, just pray it’s not a train.
  • Of course men can multitask, they read on the toilet.
  • A beautiful relationship does not depend upon how good we understand someone but on how well we avoid misunderstandings.
  • If you need time alone, try cleaning the house.
  • If I never had a bad day, how would I know whether I was having a good day?
  • Looks capture the eyes. Personality captures the heart.
  • Sometimes we all have days where we are 386’s in a P4 world.
  • “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you did not do than by the ones you did.” - Mark Twain
  • “Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without.” - Confucius
  • “If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight?” - George Carlin
  • If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
  • I’m in shape. Round is a shape, isn’t it?
  • Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
  • Is the glass half empty, half full, or twice as large as it needs to be?
  • “I wonder why you can always read a doctor’s bill and never his prescription?” - Finley Peter Dunne
  • Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
  • Disclaimer: Any errors in spelling, tact, or fact are transmission errors.
  • You are making progress if each mistake is a new one.
  • “I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.” - W. C. Fields


Do you have any thoughts you want to share? A question, maybe? Or is something in this post just plainly wrong? Then please send an e-mail to vegard at vegard dot net with your input. You can also use any of the other points of contact listed on the About page.


It looks like you're using Google's Chrome browser, which records everything you do on the internet. Personally identifiable and sensitive information about you is then sold to the highest bidder, making you a part of surveillance capitalism.

The Contra Chrome comic explains why this is bad, and why you should use another browser.