A while back I did something I haven’t done in over 10 years and back then I was wearing a uniform and someone ordered me to do it: I put on cross country skies. Me and Hans Olav went for an evening session in very icy conditions, which made it a bit of a challenge. It probably would have been a challenge no matter what, since I basically suck at moving around with anything except shoes attached to my feet.
Hallvard coined it quite well when he summarized what I’ve told him by calling it “Vegard does things he can’t handle”. But I only fell twice and manage to make it home without any noticeable injuries.
It is a well-known fact that all Norwegians are born with skies on their feet, but unfortunately, some of us tend to lose them early on. In my case, I blame my parents for this. One winter, when I was a kid, I wanted slalom gear. I’m not sure why exactly, probably because all the kids I knew had it. My parents told me that if I skied down a small slope by our house 50 times in a day, they’d buy me slalom gear. I’ve got some very sneaky parents; of course there is no way in hell a kid with an average attention span is going to ski down a slope 50 times in one day. So, mom and dad, you might think that you saved money with your shenanigans, but if they’d just bought me the damn gear, I probably would have been a world famous athlete by now. Or maybe not.
Anyway. I should probably get myself some budget cross country skies and shoes of my own, in the end of February I’m going on an actual ski-weekend. Who would have thunk it? Not me.
Here’s proof that I’ve been out in the snowy woods. Notice the professional style. Yes, that’s me.