Last weekend just seemed to last and last. This weekend was over before I could blink, and that sucks monkey balls. I think I need a new vacation soon, the only real vacation I’ve had since 2002 was the week I spent in Rome with Hans Olav, and that wasn’t exactly the most exiting week of my life.

Today I did something I should’ve done a long time ago, I added a bunch of one-liners people have e-mailed to me. Here are the new additions:

• Goals are deceptive. The unaimed arrow never misses.
• I thought I was wrong once, but it turns out I was mistaken.
• In a world without walls and fences who needs Windows and Gates?
• Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.
• I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
• If you’re not having fun, then you’re not doing it right.
• I have a strong will but a weak won’t.
• If all the cars on the Earth were lined up bumper to bumper, some idiot would try to pass them.
• To err is human, to forgive highly unlikely.
• Sex on TV can’t hurt unless you fall off.
• There are 10 types of people, those who understand binary and those who don’t.
• I’m not paranoid, they really are after me.
• Old age is nothing to worry about, except if you’re a cheese.
• It’s people that give drinking a bad name.

As always, you can find a complete listing of one-liners here and a random one hidden on the bottom of every page.