Funny one-liners, the ultimate collection! This is the complete listing of all the funny one-liners you see on the bottom of every page. They are listed in the opposite order of when they were added. So the most recent additions are listed first.



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If you find a solution and become attached to it, the solution may become your next problem.

He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.

— Lao Tsu

He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.

— Lao Tsu

He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another’s mishap.

Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

— Woody Allen

Don’t stop to stomp ants when the elephants are stampeding.

The world really isn’t any worse. It’s just that the news coverage is so much better.

The advertisement is the most truthful part of a newspaper.

— Thomas Jefferson

Every journalist has a novel in him, which is an excellent place for it.

Things will get better despite our efforts to improve them.

— Will Rogers
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