Funny one-liners, the ultimate collection! This is the complete listing of all the funny one-liners you see on the bottom of every page. They are listed in the opposite order of when they were added. So the most recent additions are listed first.
Never trust a dog to watch your food.
Truth is the most valuable thing we have. Let us economize it.
I thought about getting a tattoo, but decided to yell “look at me!” everywhere I went instead.
Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
Every morning when I open the front door to leave for work, I tell my dog to stay, and every time I wish it were the other way around.
Why kill time when you can make it work for you?
My wife says I can join your gang but I have to be home by 9.
Have hope for the future, but maybe build a bomb shelter anyway.
I was addicted to the hokey pokey. But thankfully, I turned myself around.
Don’t trust atoms, they make up everything.