I’ve come to realize that I’d never actually lived alone until me and Gine broke up last year. When I moved out of my parents house at the age of 18, I spent a year together with a tightly knit group of other guys who also crawled around in green outfits while learning how to kill people. No, I didn’t join the French Foreign Legion, Norway has one year mandatory military service for all male citizens.
After that I moved from one shared apartment to another while getting my degrees, landing my first job and co-funding my first (and most likely only) company. Living with other people was great most of the time, I both had the option to get some privacy when I needed it and to be social whenever that was the flavour of the day. Of course there were moments when living in a shared apartment seemed like a bad idea, but it was mostly good times - everyone that has lived in a shared apartment of some kind probably agrees with me on that one.
It was not until I bought my own apartment in 2006 that I could have potentially lived alone for the first time. But in reality I didn’t, of course - even though Gine didn’t officially move in until roughly 10 months later, she was around a lot.
All that has changed now. Now it’s me, me and then some more me. And I have to admit it sucks monkey balls at times. I’ve never been the most social person, in the past I could easily sit alone in front of my computer for hours, playing a game or tinkering with this site. But, and I never thought I would say this, it just doesn’t appeal that much to me anymore.
One of the reasons could be that I now have a lot of time on my hands. I’m working half days and the only other thing I do regularly is going to the gym. Computers will always be an important hobby for me, but I can only spend so much time with a single hobby before I need a break from it. Maybe I am - shock and horror - growing up and my hormones and brain are desperately trying to tell me that other things should be prioritized now? Nah… But I do think it’s about time for me to pull my left thumb out of my ass and start forcing myself on my friends. I have to admit I’m not very good at that. Hopefully they won’t get too tired of me.
In the process of writing this entry, I think I’ve changed my mind a little, it’s not single life I don’t like1. Instead the entry should probably be renamed “Sitting Home Alone Entertaining Myself isn’t as Much Fun as it Used to be”, but that title is way too long and the current one is more dramatic, so I’ll stick to that.
To be honest I’m not that fond of being single either, I’m still trying to appreciate all this freedom some other single people seem to enjoy so much, but I just can’t get the hang of it. So I’m planning to do something about being single in the not-so-distant future. But that’s a story for another entry. ↩︎
2009-05-04 22:31 CET